Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Epic Fail

Alternate titles for this post include "What the F Just Happened?!" "I Hate Oakland." "I Want to Punch Someone Right in the Mouth" and "Snatching Defeat from the Jaws of Victory."

I had to take a little self-timeout before trying to post anything, because my first attempt was little more than a string of words I wouldn't want my mother to hear me using.

Tonight was bad. It was real bad. I don't know who I feel more sorry for...those of us who stayed up and witnessed the whole miserable thing, or people who went to sleep certain of obvious victory, only to see the box score in the morning.

Maybe it's good that the game ended on such a blatantly bogus call at the plate. Cuz this way, I can focus my anger on the umpire. Although, for the record, we are more than capable of losing close games all on our own...fair and square. We don't need help from inarguably bad calls thank you very much.

And Oakland...for about 5 minutes, I actually felt sorry for you...with your 7 fans and your ugly-ass white shoes. But now...NOW...IT IS ON. I have abandoned all pity and renewed my hatred and fine-tuned my bloodlust to a fever pitch. Oakland, you must be destroyed. Take no prisoners.

I will be very disappointed if Gardy doesn't get himself ejected by the 4th inning tomorrow. There must be smack, and it must get laid the hell down.


luckie/sarah said...

But...Breslow! Wasn't he Boof's backup last season? At least take comfort in him getting the win.
The rest of it? Well, I wasn't quite following, but when the pitching staff gives up that much of a lead, not much to say.

Waterboy23 said...

Well at least I watched the newest episode of True Blood while the damage was being done .... my morning has not been good.

Heidi said...

I think waking up to see the box score was worse than staying up to watch it. Because there were so many questions and anger. At least my morning was redeemed with a free cinnamon chip scone from starbucks. http://www.starbucks.com/retail/print_free_pastry.html here's the link for a free pastry, but you have to print it and use it before 10:30am. I just thought I'd share because it helped me not feel so sad.

Cait said...

Actual e-mail I sent post game last night.
"I just threw up in my mouth a little."

That seriously was the worst... ugh. I can't even talk about it yet.

Nick N. said...

"Epic Fail" summarizes the ballgame perfectly, I'd say.

JS said...

Hey, at least...

Okay, no.

Jeremiah said...

Horribly bad call aside, blowing more than 10 runs is inexcusable. Then again... so was that call. At least we got the win tonight. That's all I got.

Anonymous said...

Having no cable, and being extremely busy, I did not listen to the game that night. I did hear the score on the radio the next morning, but no details... not thinking much of it, I wore my Twins shirt to work that day, and that opened the floodgates to a rash of grief directed at Our Boys.

Well... one thing led to another and my boss Mr. Negative Nelly (sometimes I call him Sid Hartman for fun) and I ended up making an office wager on how the team finishes this year. Of course, I back The Boys.

And now Our Boys must win the Division in order for me to be taken out for lunch by my boss. If they come in second I owe him one potica. If they come in third I owe him two poticas.

Anyone who is confused at this point should google "potica"

Bottom line: Go Twins! (I'm just refusing to go negative)