Wednesday, February 18, 2009

A-Rod and dumb t-shirts annoy me.

There were 3 quotes that stood out to me from today's Yankee circus.  Well, technically it was yesterday's Yankee circus...damn my post-midnight/pre-sleep blogging habits.  Anyway....

1) A-Rod saying "Baseball is bigger than Alex Rodriguez," sheerly for the massive amount of irony oozing from the statement.....that he was making from his own press conference....as the entire universe revolved around the press-conference tent and time stood still.... 

2) A-Rod saying "This has been a very emotional time for me" in a tone so emotionless, it is generally reserved only for actual robots, and Keanu Reeves.

3) Brian Cashman saying "This is an asset that's currently in crisis, so we will do everything we can to protect that asset." Hmm. How heartfelt.  That just really puts it all in perspective, doesn't it?  For a split second, it made me feel just a little bit sorry for A-Rod.  It's got to be more than a little frightening to be at a point in your life where the only reason people stand by you is because you are financially valuable to them.  Perhaps that's the sort of thing that might breed the insecurity that would lead a naturally talented athlete to take steroids in order to live up to expectations in the first place.  Chicken...egg....


Meanwhile, in my world where I only really care about Twins stuff....I went to my local Scheels store today.   The Twins merchandise section was totally depressing.  Now, I fully recognize that I live in Wisconsin, and therefore the Brewers stuff is going to take precedence.  I can live with that.  But the Twins section just keeps dwindling down to nothingness.  The Cubs section dwarfs it, and there's an equal (if not greater) amount of Detroit Tigers stuff now.  WTF.  It makes me sad.  But there was a new shirt there that caught my eye.  It said "Minnesota Chicks Dig the Longball."  Which struck me as odd for 2 reasons....firstly, it's being sold in Wisconsin, and secondly....the Twins are not specifically known for excessive home-run hitting.  So...if Minnesota Chicks really only dig the longball, they should maybe look elsewhere for entertainment.

I think a far more approriate shirt would say "Minnesota [and Surrounding Area] Chicks Dig the Longball, but Honestly, They Prefer Consistent Defensive Prowess and A Healthy On-Base Percentage.  Also, Attractive Facial Features Do Not Hurt."  

But I suppose that's a lot of words to fit on a shirt, so they probably just shortened it or something.  They should have kept the facial features part instead.

7 comments:

Jessica said...

I'm actually working on a shirt that includes "chicks dig the Longo Ball," but in the Rays world that does apply. Plus he has attractive facial features so that's good...

They should make a Twins shirt that says "What's not to love about them?"

PatGLex said...

There's a website called The Names Brand [www.thenamesbrand.com] that lists names that are instantly recognizable. (See website for examples.) But there's not one for the Twins. Maybe we should suggest one?
Justin +
Joe +
Francisco +

{add your own name suggestions here}

And at least in Wisconsin there is some Twins merchandise. I live in Reds country, so I'm doubly cursed -- it's a NL town, with its only AL bias the miserable Yankees.

caryn said...

the "chicks dig the long ball" sexist bs is leftover from the 80s. there was a commercial with tom glavine and heather locklear. it is the highest of high comedy.

You can see it here:
http://metsgrrl.com/index.php/site/comments/chicks-dig/

Anonymous said...

I read a piece in Time magazine about the A-Roid bruhaha. I liked their take:

"If we wanted a pharmacuetical freak show, we'd all watch professional wrestling."

As someone who grew up on the glory days of the WWF, I found this doubly amusing.

--tammy

Jeremiah said...

To shorten your shirt, let's just put it at "Twins chicks dig Nick Punto"

A-Rod... never did like him. I think he's the real reason Griffey left Seattle. And poor Griffey, he didn't take steroids and got left in the mess after McGwire, Sosa, Bonds and even Frank Thomas.

Skippy tastes better than Jiff said...

I guess A-Roid is taking advantage of the stimulus package--as well as a lot of otehr players.

Katie said...

Jeremiah--I would totally wear that shirt.