Wednesday, February 4, 2009

The fine line between fiscal responsibility and being a dirty dirty cheapskate

I cannot believe the Twins are holding out on Matt Guerrier for a half a million dollars. Just for comparison's sake, this amount is 1/7 of the $3.5 million the Twins owed Mike Lamb for NOT playing in '09 (not to mention that it's 1/6 of the $3 million we paid Mike Lamb to ride the pine in '08).

It's fair to say that I am annoyed. And I'm not even Matt Guerrier.

I know it's tough economic times, what with the crippling recession and all. And fiscal responsibility is generally good. But there is a fine line between being fiscally responsible and being a dirty dirty cheapskate. Here are some Do's and Don'ts for dealing with the economic crisis:

Do consider switching your pets to a generic dog food (unless it's tainted, obviously).
Don't eat your pets as a way to save money on groceries AND pet food.

Do save money on expensive salon visits by using a DIY hair color kit.
Don't save money on expensive dentist visits by using a DIY root canal kit.

If your kids complain about generic cereal, Do put the generic in a name-brand box. They’ll never know the difference!
If your husband complains about generic alcohol, Don't put 99 cent Walmart rubbing alcohol in his vodka bottle. You'll probably kill him.

Do think twice before throwing good money after bad and spending millions and millions of dollars on aging free-agents who may or may not actually contribute to your baseball team.
Don't be petty and squabble with a quality, generally reliable, reliever over half a million dollars.

In related news, podcast episode 2 is up at and on iTunes. Check it out. I was annoyed about the Matt Guerrier thing when I recorded it, but that was even before I knew all the details. Had I known the hang up was over such a relatively small amount of money, there would have been much, MUCH, more raging against the machine.

Much like one of my all-time favorite children's books, "There's a Monster at the End of This Book," there is a Contest at the End of This Podcast. You can win a Twins Fest grab bag. So, if you weren't able to make it to Twins Fest, or you didn't get yourself a grab bag, all is not lost. Check out the podcast, solve the puzzle, and a grab bag could be yours!


Anonymous said...

The Monster At the End of This Book was also one of my all time favorites. Ah, that Lovable Grover!

I call BS on this Matty G bidness. I really hope it works itself out.


Curveball said...

Hey, a half-million can go a long ways to fill that hole at third -- like hiring a groundskeeper one-year out and buying a lot of smoking grass from Colorado!!!!!

Wanta know what's in the grab bag before I do all that stuff!

Katie said...

And I'd love to tell you what's in the grab bag, but then it would not be a grab bag at all, by definition.

Jeremiah said...

Well, they signed Matty G for another year... I hope they give him a longer deal next year.

Jay said...

I think Bill Smith misconstrued the criticism of the team signing Hernandez, Lamb, Everette, Ponson, White, Boone, Monroe, et al as fans not wanting him to spend money AT ALL...when in actuality we would simply like him to spend money on QUALITY talent. He's currently subscribing to the "how can I screw something up if I don't do anything at all" mantra.