Friday, October 24, 2008

Every Google Deserves an Answer: World Series Edition

I'm a firm believer that every possible question should be answered by Google.

And lord knows there are some weird-ass questions out there. Sometimes I get a kick out of looking to see what Google keywords bring people to this blog...and answering the questions. It's my way of helping Google out.

This is the World Series Edition.

The Rays are a fairly new phenomena on the National front, so I guess it makes sense that people seem to have lots of questions about them. So let's get right to it.

"Why Matt Garza spit so much?" [sic]
This, my friend, is an excellent question, and one we don't really know the answer to, for certain. Excessive saliva is a common symptom of many neurological disorders, but I think in Garza's case, it's probably just a bad habit he picked up in Little League--a cautionary tale for the parents out there.

I do find it interesting that SO many people are Googling this. There were a lot of variations including "Matt Garza gross spitting," "Garza spits too much," "Matt Garza spit," etc. I think it's safe to say that "Why does Garza spit so much?" is the new "What's on Swisher's face?"

"Did Jason Bartlett play for the Zephyrs baseball team?"
Sadly...No.

I say sadly, because he was playing minor league ball at the very same time when the New Orleans Zephyrs were my closest option for real baseball. He certainly would have made those games more interesting and visually appealing. Jason played all of his AA and up ball in the Twins' farm system.

Actually, there are quite a few personal-type questions about Jason Bartlett. Ladies....he's super cute and good at baseball, so I don't blame you a bit for wanting to Google that boy's brains out. But, he is married (which answers another half-dozen Google queries). Plus, us Twins fans saw him first. So...Chill.


"Pedroia Shirtless"
Hasn't everyone already seen this?


I guess not, because people continue Googling for it.

"Adam Rodriguez is not the type of man you'd kick out of bed."

OK, so this one is not actually a question. It is also not technically baseball-related in any way. But it IS a statement with which I absolutely concur, 100%.

It is also a very bizarre sentence to Google, so it deserves to be documented. (And it gave me an excuse to post another picture of Adam Rodriguez.)


"Joe Maddon Shirtless"
Sweet fancy Moses. I'm thinking/praying that there is only one person in the world Googling this. I'm a little disturbed that it brought them HERE. But, in the interest of making sure no one leaves this blog disappointed:



Now...whoever you are, I urge you....seek help.

Immediately.

8 comments:

Jessica said...

Yep, I even get the what does Garza spit? What do mean what? Ick.

As for Jason Bartlett. I can appreciate him from a distance. I'm sure you called dibs a long time ago. I say the same thing about Rocco.

Katie said...

Don't worry, jessica....we don't mind sharing with you. You jumped on the bandwagon way before everyone else too.

haasertime said...

someone once googled "matt garza listens to tupac" and landed at alright hamilton.

it was probably tupac. he loves googling himself with other famous people.

Anonymous said...

I equate Garza's spitting with Joe Nathan's "motorboat."

Unfortunately for Garza, Nathan just has a more adorable, sanitary, pre-pitch, nervous habit... but I must say, I think Garzie's skin has cleared up, he's looking cuter than ever!

--tammy

k-bro said...

Wow! Who knew Joe Maddon looked like that? Those baseball uniforms sure hide a lot. I'll have to pay closer attention.

Mrs. Slowey said...

oh wow...the joe madden picture is slightly disturbing. his body is so much younger than him...lol. love it!

Baseball_Lipgloss said...

I also concur on the Adam Rodriguez statement.

Anonymous said...

http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/blog/big_league_stew/post/-Bossman-Junior-Upton-takes-place-among-basebal?urn=mlb,118202

BJ Upton, origin of "BJ" story.

--tammy