This whole Santana thing really just feels like a bad break-up.
Those Girls were drinking last night with Lipgloss & Baseball. It was great fun. And then we saw the ESPN headline that the Mets and Santana had officially reached a record-breaking contract agreement. It was the sports bar equivalent to finding out that an ex has changed their Facebook/MySpace status to "In a Relationship." You KNEW it was coming. It was inevitable. You fully expected it, but actually SEEING it still feels like a sucker punch to the gut.
And you're torn, because you kind of want them to be happy, and you should be happy for them that their new girlfriend is giving them $137.5 million, because you know that he really IS a good guy. But you're still kind of bitter and sad about it.
Then Those Girls went to a Timberwolves basketball game. Which, in this lengthy and ridiculous analogy, is the equivalent of going on a date with a new guy that you KNOW is not your type because your friends say that you need to shake things up and try something new to get your mind off of your recent heartbreak. But it's weird and awkward, and you're uncomfortable, but your date tries really hard to impress you by winning the game by 21 points, even though they usually suck at basketball.
It was a good effort, but you won't be returning their calls for a second date.
So then you're just stuck in a funk. And you know in your heart that you're going to be fine, and you're probably NOT going to die from this. But you still get really irritated when other people say things like "it's not the end of the world," and "things are going to be OK," and "it's only a game."
So for now you're just going to sit in your comfy chair with some Cherry Garcia, and watch Gilmore Girls DVDs all day and wait for spring.